- Publish Date
- Friday, 15 June 2018, 11:55AM
A woman has been left fuming after her mother-in-law sneaked into her newborn daughter's maternity ward and held the baby before she got a chance to.
The baffled mum took to the British parenting forum Mumsnet to vent her frustrations explaining she was still receiving stitches after undergoing an emergency C-section due to a "traumatic birth" when the grandma "let herself in without permission".
The newborn's grandma – who is an NHS doctor – used her access pass to sneak onto the ward to see the child.
The mother wrote: "I wasn’t asked if it was okay if she could be there, and because I was being stitched up on theatre still, she held my DD (darling daughter) before I even got to."
"I’m so angry and upset about this."
"Prior to going into labour, I’d discussed with DH (dear husband) that I didn’t want anyone visiting for at least a day or so, let alone have MIL (mother-in-law) there before I’d even held my own child."
She added: "I’m livid that the midwives allowed her to be there without asking me and I’m angry that DH didn’t advocate for me more too. He should have told her not to come, or to wait outside."
Posting six weeks later, she continued: "I’m actually in tears this morning thinking about it all again and I’m so angry and upset still."
Parents on the forum reacted with outrage and agreed the mother-in-law was out of line, as the skin-on-skin contact immediately after birth is commonly cited as one of the best ways for a mum to bond with her new child.
“I'd be livid. What a violation,” one mum said.
Another added: "You are completely justified in feeling violated and angry. You’re also justified in feeling unsupported and let down by your husband."
A third wrote: "The father could have held the baby! You need to tell MIL what she did was not OK and you expect an apology."
Others defended the mother-in-law, saying she was just doing what her son asked her to do.
"If my son ever phoned me in a state of distress, desperately needing my support, I would be there in a flash," one woman wrote.
"If you're that upset then it's your DH you need to be upset with. Your MIL only did what her son asked her to. As a parent it seems natural she would support her child," agreed another.
What do you think?