- Publish Date
- Tuesday, 3 October 2017, 1:30PM
A 28-year-old woman has taken to the internet to ask for advice after her boyfriend gave her an ultimatum: If she wants him to propose, she'll have to lose some weight.
The couple, who have been together for five years, live in the house they own together, but apparently, the boyfriend needs a more "weighty" commitment from his potential future wife.
Someecards user, "Toofat2wife" asked her boyfriend if she was being "led on" by staying with him for so long with no proposal.
His answer shocked her and the rest of the internet: "He doesn't see himself proposing until I've become more fit" she shared.
The post, which has since been deleted, said:
"My weight is something I've struggled with over the years since I was pretty much a teenager. I'm now at more of a "normal" weight, although a bit bigger than when we first started dating. I've recently put on about 10 pounds because of a bad injury and I'm now able to start working out again. As a side note, he's put on some weight as well. Not fat, but more filled out. He's been attempting to work out so that he will be more fit and I'll join. However, I think he looks fine. He's a good size for his height.
"I'm not upset that he wants me to be more fit, because I agree and it's something that I want as well. What I'm upset about is that he is using being fit as a condition of marriage. That if I stay the same, we will simply continue dating. He says that he wants to spend his life with me and that he isn't going to break up with me but he really wants to see me more fit. Marriage is more important to me than him, he would be okay with staying common law for the rest of our lives."
According to Someecards, she also added that she's "confused" about her feelings because she does want to be in shape, but she's worried that she will fall short of his "standards" in their marriage.
The post was also shared on Reddit and users were quick to offer up some advice.
"You put on extra weight because of an injury, and he wants you to 'get fit' before you exchange vows...but one of those vows is 'in sickness and in health,'
"Find someone who'll love you in sickness and in health, not if you change your body for them," commented Littlestray.
Another user, Jabberwockyjurist, pointed out how the boyfriend is using her weight as a weapon.
"Don't get fit because your SO is making it a condition of marriage," they wrote.
"Is he going to conduct weigh-ins monthly? How much weight can you gain when you get pregnant? Will he put you on a post-pregnancy diet?"
This article was first published on NZ Herald and is republished here with permission.